My Zara Jacket vs. My Age

I look around at glamourously fashionable girls in the city centre, strolling along with bagels and fabulous hair. My fringe just whacked me in the eye. Hair bands suit me, better wearing one than constantly end up brushing your hair off your face until it looks greasy and gross. Hats too, they’re good for me and my obstreperous hair. It’s all about knowing what’s good for you. What suits you.

That being said, I cannot help sometimes being a little obstinate and buying things that I just plain want to buy. Mom jeans fall into this category spectacularly. I feel that I look dreadful in them, I’m not going to lie, I feel fat. With my already large legs, clothing them with jeans that do not flatter and/or suck everything in an inch or two does not do my self esteem much good. 

It was one of those things that I saw everyone wearing and thought, yes! I want to try those! And it took me such a long time to talk myself into buying them. I found a pair that looked great on a slim model and thought that maybe they wouldn’t look so bad. Real stiff denim I have established does my figure no favours but I’ve worn them so many times because they are so spacious. I’m conflicted with feeling awful and comfortable simultaneously.


They make me self conscious in my local shopping mall which I like to call ‘Marks & Spencer central’ because it’s full of middle-aged+ men and women dishing out the dirty looks when I walk by with my intentionally mis-matched handbag and shoes. It ruins fashion for me when so many people stare, nobody has said anything yet but there is always a chance of them picking up on my attempt to feign youth by following trends.

. . .

I put on a multi coloured Zara jacket, fished from the depths of the summery side of my wardrobe from a collection sourced during the dull winter, I felt fantastic! Combined with blue skinny jeans and a pale grey cami, I saw myself parading down the street swinging my handbag to the rhythm of my internal soundtrack (come on, we all have one) but just before I left the room, I changed for something understated and more suited to my age – what does that mean?


How old am I in fashion years and why do I feel afraid of wearing a colourful jacket?

I’m 29 in October and still feel as immature as a 19 year old me tottering around in heels and short skirts. It’s not fair for it to stop being acceptable for a person to wear what he or she wants to at whatever age without judgement, because in the confines of my bedroom I feel like I can take on the world and probably could if it would let me, but as I leave my confidence stays to hide in the wardrobe and leaves me defenceless.

I walked across a supermarket car park in ripped jeans once and the comments from the elderly would keep you awake at night. I couldn’t believe that so many sweet looking little old ladies had so many horrible words to say about jeans, what could they say about an experimental combination of colours fabricated in a vaguely artistic stupor, where my inspiration usually resides? A lot. So I wear what could be considered socially acceptable when really I want to fly out the door in a prom skirt with pink in my hair and run away to find some kindred spirits!

X

I Did It!!

I survived January! 

I attended the most beautiful wedding over the weekend, for which I had been saving all of my energy for, and now I can finally get back to doing what I do best… shopping. In fact the weekend wasn’t over before I began browsing again – I know I have a problem.

I’ve gained a little weight over the past week, not a major amount but just enough that my jeans have become slightly uncomfortable around the waist. It’s just the wonderful hormones kicking in and making unhealthy food smell so good and chocolate so appealing. 

One day I stayed inside and ordered everything to come to me, and when the food arrived and I was packing it all away, I sneaked a Twix, then as I saw that the garden was frost bitten I thought to myself that a hot chocolate would be lovely. My whole week was the same, oh I’ll just have one, maybe two, maybe the packet. 

The wedding food completed my week as did two full English breakfasts and more chocolates when I got home. I felt like a balloon stuffing chocolate brownie with a dollop of clotted cream down my neck following on from a beautiful lentil soup starter and roast beef main, by the time the coffees arrived I was close to throwing up but I was so fantastically satisfied by that feeling of well and truly having my fill of food.

Sadly, I’m back into the not so sparkly real world where I have to cook for myself and it’s not as fun as having a smartly dressed waiter serve me my favourite meals and top up my glass whenever I take a sip. I’m going to have to be nice to myself and buy myself some jeans for the sake of comfort until I drop that extra weight.

MOTO VINTAGE BLUE MOM JEANS

Topshop vintage blue Mom jeans £40

I bought these during my online browsing Sunday evening and thought they looked so super comfy and I had never bought any Mom jeans when the style was re-released. Now felt like a good time.

As I am the way that I am, I cannot buy only one item, I must make it worth my while by having at least two, so with it being the month of luuurve very shortly I found myself a plain red long sleeve top with bell sleeves (my new favourite detail on tops and blouses) and thought I’d love to wear a comfortable tee to our Valentines meal as we don’t make too much of a huge deal out of it but we always go for a meal some time during the Valentine’s week, no candles or sweet nothings whispered, no gifts just a simple meal. I thought it would be nice to wear a casual top but unlike my usual black/white/grey colour scheme. Red it is.

LONG SLEEVE PIE CRUST FRILL NECK TOP

The BELL SLEEVES! £19.

I cannot wait to try these on as an outfit and apart, I just have to wait for my confirmation of arrival and I can go pick them up! 

X

[both images: Topshop.com]

I Fell In Love With The White Company

I find it funny how I’ve changed so much from a H&M loving poor student to a Selfridges shopper in a few short years. It’s not that I have a lot of money (I really don’t), I just don’t waste as much now as I used to. It was a dream of mine to be able to buy what I wanted (within reason) once I left my university debts behind and I feel like I’ve achieved that. I buy myself something major once a month and it keeps me happy, like a reward for living with just enough to get by for so long. Nothing flamboyant, always sensible but still in fashion so that I feel good about myself, because let’s face it we need to feel good about ourselves.

I fell for the ‘throw away fashion’ of a few years ago, buying armfuls of cheaply made clothing from a sweat shop outlet, I wasn’t too educated about their working conditions until much later but now I can barely bring myself to set foot in the store let alone buy anything, it’s like fur for me, it shouldn’t be made, or the workers should be respected and given adequate payment and conditions. I digress. 


I think working where I do has changed my perspective, I process a combination of cheaper made products and designer along side eachother, and you can see a clear difference in quality, so I started seeing clothing and accessories differently. No longer did I see that buying expensive items was superficial and unnecessary, I saw an extension of my mind, labelling myself as valuable instead of worthless, a way to show that I respect myself and my earnings.

A few days ago I placed an order on Selfridges.com for a White Company jumper dress and a Ted Baker handbag totalling £267. I felt awful when the payment went through as I don’t spend that much in one chunk I tend to spread it across the month, but now that they have arrived I feel I have two extremely good quality items and neither that I will wear only once. I couldn’t believe the feel of a wool and cashmere garment so much that I wondered into The White Company store in Grand Central Station. I saw the colour scheme, white, grey and black surrounded by natural wood decor with fragrance emanating from the candles and I fell head over heels for the quality and plain, classic style of everything. 


I had heard bloggers raving about it on YouTube but always thought it was for older classy, rich women, the kind with pure cotton bed sheets and specialist tea from Harrods, but really how silly do I feel? It can be for anyone, even if out of price range for some people their reductions during sales are extremely reasonable. I’m a happy little shopper.

Happy holidays to all and have a prosperous New Year.

X

[images 1&2: thewhitecompany.com, image 3: mine]